There is no normal life….
“There is no normal life, Wyatt, there’s just life”. – Val Kilmer as Doc Holiday in Tombstone.
Truer words have never been spoken. Everyone has a story to tell. Everyone has some kind of battle they are fighting. For Fibro patients, we’re never quite sure what today’s battle is going to be.
I had a flare up last week that crossed my eyes. I have about two of those a year. Flare ups are a little different for everyone. Some has more gastrointestinal issues, some have other symptoms, but the one thing that flare ups have in common is the surge in pain levels. Fibro patients in the middle of a flare hurt all over. It’s been described by my friend as feeling like a truck ran over her. I usually say I feel like someone pushed me down the stairs. It’s our way of trying to make light of it, because there are days that you cannot believe how much pain you’re in.
I am in the minority of Fibro patients that also have issues with oxygen consumption. That means that I don’t use oxygen efficiently, and passing out in Walmart has been something that was a possibility. In the middle of a flare, it hurts to move, it hurts to breathe deeply, it just hurts.
Because of my oxygen issues, I turn blue when I am cold or stressed. My d.h. has actually watched my fingertips turn blue in the middle of an argument, looked at me, and refused to argue with me anymore. It’s not unusual for my fingernails or my toenails to be blue on a daily basis, and I have gone as far as to paint them or wear socks more so no one can see my blue feet. I’m not on in-home oxygen anymore, but I was a little over a year ago. I live in a much warmer climate now so it’s a little easier to keep my O2 levels over 93%, and that makes the doctors happy.
Stress prompts flare ups. So do the storms here in Florida. Sometimes, I’m not sure where they come from, but I miss my massage therapist up in Maine who used to be able to touch me and say “Oh, Cris, you’re on the verge of a flare…go home and get into bed”. I miss my Susan. She brought a lot of peace and comfort into my life.
I have tried everything for pain relief. Osteopathic manipulation, trigger point injections, nerve blocks, acupuncture, reiki, massage therapy, heat, cold, botox injections. I’ve been through the gamut. These days I rely on heat pads (my herby ricey thing) and pain meds. I’m waiting on a new pain doc who promises new procedures. Cross your fingers.
We have storms coming today and tomorrow in northeast Florida. I went to bed last night expecting to wake up hurting because of them, but I am not in too terrible shape this morning. I feel it coming though. Just under my collar bones is very tender….that means the storms are on their way.